1) Those big bows I make her wear...
She hates them. But there is an important Bible verse that we quote to our kids which is "Fashion has it's price." Oh, wait that's from Veggie Tales not the Bible. Still, it applies. The bows, though ridiculously huge, are here to stay.2) This little girl has a joy about her. One of the songs I sing to her at night is "She's got a way" by Billy Joel. Two fitting lines from the song are...
She's got a smile that heals
I don't know why it is
But I have to laugh when she reveals me
She's got a light around her
And everywhere she goes
A million dreams of love surround her
Everywhere
That's Luci. This is what insight my sister had to offer on her, "She makes people feel good about themselves. She smiles at people and they think 'I am good with babies', but the truth is that Luci is good with adults." So if you are down, give me a call. Lulu may just flash you this infectious wide-mouthed grin...
3) She does this precious little thing where she gently caresses your face. It's so sweet...
Then it suddenly turns into a Vulcan Death Grip...
We're lucky to have all our lips and eyeballs still in tact.4) I've been trying to learn about bonding and attachment. As a result, I've been kind of Gestapo about other people holding her. The part about not having others hold her for the first month was our social worker's suggestion to promote bonding. I think it is very important and I'm glad we have been careful. But the Gestapo part was all me. I have been obsessing over her attaching to us. I have been trying to control her environment in such a way that will ensure that she will attach to me. Newsflash: I can't ensure anything in life.
While we need to do everything we can to try to help her form healthy attachments, I have to trust that God is ultimately in control. I need to pray that she will be able to form those attachments instead of worrying about it. And I need to give it time. I need to give her time. I can't make her bond to us. What I can do is provide an environment that promotes attachment. I can love her and meet her needs and become of a student of her. I can give her the freedom to be right where she is in the grieving/bonding/attaching process. And I can let my mom and sister have a just little bit of time to hold her...
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12 comments:
so sweet. I love the "light" part of the song...due the meaning of Luci...bringer of light! Love it!
Oh, I just love that song. It's one of my favorite songs for my girls, too. Luci is just precious and will certainly attach to her wonderful mama--sounds like you're doing a great job.
Oh, Missy. That first picture of your Mom holding her just did me in!! That is THE MOST PRECIOUS picture ever!!!!
Love the pics....the gently touches to death grip- funny!!!!
She is so stinkin' cute! I just wanna eat her up! About the bows, JI doesn't like to wear them either. But, I think it's OK to impose your desires on her. :)
That first pic of Luci with your mom is priceless.
Missy, this is a beautiful post! Such sweet pictures!
Pretty sure the attachment thing will work itself out. : ) And, sharing your sweetie with grandma & aunts is perfectly fine...they love her, too.
So, that first picture of Lulu~Adria was standing by me & said, "baby pretty...I hug her." We had to pretend to take Luci off the screen so Adria could hug her hands to her chest, all the while pretending to hold the baby. : )
Sheri
I love the pic of Gunga holding the baby!
What a great post!! Your luci is so darn cute!! AND, the bows MUST stay around...they are way too cute :) love the pics..priceless, kj
Love the pictures! You are doing a great job. I am sure there is already a huge difference in her bonding/attaching, but it is hard when you are with her day after day.
Very cute picture of Grandma holding Luci! Darling!
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