Fast Forward, Rewind and Pause

I've been reflecting a bit on what this waiting process has been like so far. I am anxiously awaiting the day when we will get our referral (I think we're #8 now). I want to FAST FORWARD time because I am so excited for it to be "our turn". I want to see our little girl's face and pray for her by name. It's so weird to have this affection in my heart for her when there is no object of affection yet. Even more, I long for the day when I will board a plane to go someplace I never dreamed I would go to bring home a daughter I have dreamed about holding in my arms for 5 years. And actually meet this little person for whom we have waited. I look forward to figuring out what our family is supposed to become...our new "normal" (Like we were ever normal???).

But right now there are these 3 kids in my home. They are growing so fast. Before I know it they are going to be driving and texting and (gasp) dating. Time is marching on and I wish I could hit a PAUSE button. But alas, I don't have a pause button. What I can do is enjoy this time. I need to treasure the cute little things they say and do. I need to eat up the time I have with them. Before too long my house will be plenty quiet. I won't be refereeing any fights. And I will have adequate "me" time. When that day comes, I will be wishing I could hit REWIND and have back a little of the chaos that is my life right now.

We're waiting and hoping and preparing, but I don't want to live in the future. I don't want to live in the past either. I want to live in the moment and not miss out on what God has for me right now. The picture below captures how I want to live my life in this regard:

I want to live each day the way Jack does...with joy, passion, energy, laughter, gratefulness and a whole lotta rock star swagger.

But maybe with a little less volume.